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Saturday, July 15, 2006
Numbers takes its title from the census with which it begins and that with which it ends. It opens in the wilderness of Sinai, in the second year after the Israelites had left Egypt, and closes at the edge of the Promised Land, 40 years later. In between is a long and sad record of the failure of Israel to believe in God's provision and power during the wanderings in the wilderness.
Numbers is a dramatic turn for a very hard lesson: To trust God instead of our own "reasoning". Numbers takes its title from the census with which it begins and that with which it ends. It opens in the wilderness of Sinai, in the second year after the Israelites had left Egypt, and closes at the edge of the Promised Land, 40 years later. In between is a long and sad record of the failure of Israel to believe in God's provision and power during the wanderings in the wilderness.
The first 10 chapters summarize God's providing for Israel's guidance and warfare. The major part of the book, from chapters 11 through 21, is a description of the continual complaint and rebelling of the people. The latter part, from chapters 22 through 36, is a record of the protection of Israel despite their failure.
The book opens with God's command to number from the 12 tribes, the men of war from 20 years old and upward and gives a census of the fighting men of the nation. The total amounted to 603,550. The Levites were omitted as being dedicated to the service of the Tabernacle. So their place was made up by dividing the tribe of Joseph into two tribes, named for Joseph's sons, Ephraim and Manasseh. It is instructive that only those who had a clean pedigree could go forth to war. The lesson for the Christian is clear: only those who are certain they belong to the family of God can do battle in the spiritual warfare to which they were called.
The camp is set in order, with three tribes placed at each of the four points of direction. The Levites gathered around the Tabernacle, which is to be the center of everything in the national life. Every man had his own appointed place in the army of Israel.
In place of the firstborn of every family, whom God had claimed for Himself, the entire tribe of Levi is substituted. There were 22,000 acceptable Levites. But since there were 22,273 firstborn sons, for the extra 273 firstborn sons above the number of Levites, God accepted redemption money which went to maintain Aaron and his family.
Each of the families of Levi was then assigned their special role in the work of caring for the Tabernacle. The family of Kohath was responsible to carry the holy furniture. The curtains and the tents were given to the Gershonites, and the foundations of the Tabernacle were committed to the Merarites.
The restrictions on those who took the voluntary vow of a Nazirite are given. They were to refrain from the use of alcohol in any form, from the cutting of their hair or beard, and from contact with dead bodies. The Nazirite vows were taken as an act of consecration to some special service to God.
It deals with the voluntary offering of the princes of Israel for the maintenance of worship. It is a monotonous (BORING) recording of each man's identical offering. But the fact that it was so carefully chronicled indicates an interest of God in the individual's gift. The Levites then appear again, are separated from the rest of the people, cleansed, sprinkled, shaven, and finally presented to the Lord by Aaron.
The Passover was kept for the first time after leaving Egypt. Provision was made for the observance of it again one month later for certain ones who were unclean on the first occasion. The second thing to be done was to make clear the provision for guidance in the cloud and fire which rested over the Tabernacle. The people were not responsible to determine either the time or the direction of their march but were required only to be obedient to the signs. Sometimes the clouds stayed put for two days, or a month, or even longer, and then, however difficult and dangerous was the location, there was no option but to remain encamped. "Wait" is probably one of the hardest words to learn in the vocabulary of spiritual discipline.
The third requirement before the cloud lifted was to learn the signals of the trumpets when they sounded. These signals understood, the cloud over the Tabernacle was taken up and the people began their journey through the wilderness of Sinai. Then there's the call of Moses to invite the presence of the Lord, both at their setting out and their resting, thus indicating that everything is centered in the presence and government of God.
Numbers records the people's discontent with God's provision and care. The first complaint is against the hardship of their circumstances, but when the fire of the Lord burned among them and Moses attempted to intercede on their behalf, God took the fire away.
The next complaint arose over the diet of manna. All they could think of were the melons, the cucumbers, the leeks, onions, and garlic of Egypt. They forgot the bondage and misery of Egypt and remembered only its delights. Moses, in his complaint to God, came perilously close to joining their whining; but God's answer is to appoint elders to assist Moses in the oversight of the people, because Moses felt he couldn't do it all alone. To the people God sent quails in such abundance that they ate them for an entire month--and then began to complain about too much meat.
These rumblings of discontent were followed by a mutiny in Moses' own family. Aaron and Miriam became upset at Moses' marriage to a woman from Ethiopia. Though God directly explained to Aaron and Miriam that He had called Moses to a specialized ministry, nevertheless their jealousy continued and Miriam was punished with leprosy. Moses asked for the leprosy to be removed, and God said to banish her for 7 days and then she would be healed.
By this time the thousands of Israelites had reached Kadesh-Barnea, at the edge of the Promised Land. At God's command, 12 spies were chosen to enter the land and view both its resources and its dangers. After 40 days, the men returned, bringing visible evidence of the land's fertility. But there was both a majority and a minority. Ten spies compared themselves with the giants and were unhappy, but the two other spies, Joshua and Caleb, compared the giants with God and were encouraged. Upon hearing the majority report the people mutinied and decided they would all go back to Egypt. Although Moses and Aaron begged them not to rebel against God, and Joshua and Caleb pled with them to act in faith rather than fear, the people responded by picking up stones to stone them.
At this, God's patience was exhausted and He threatened to cut them off and raise up another people through Moses. Once again, Moses interfered with the people, pleading the honor of God and the gloating of the Egyptians should they ever hear that God was "unable" to bring His people into the land. Again it was God's grace, working through His human instrument, Moses, to plead the cause of mercy.
The people were pardoned their rebellion, but were sentenced to 40 years of wandering in the wilderness and exclusion from the land for everyone over 20 years of age. In a response of remorse rather than repentance, the people promised to go up to the land and attempted to do so in spite of the warning that their day of opportunity was gone. A defeat at the hands of the Amalekites and Canaanites was the result. God had not gone with them.
In preparation for their 40 years of wandering, certain sacrifices and laws were repeated, with the explanation that they would be fulfilled when the people went into the Promised Land. What followed illustrated that they were not clear whether the laws were to be enforced in the wilderness. One man was found gathering sticks on the Sabbath and was put in custody until they determined the mind of God toward him. The people were immediately instructed to put him to death according to the law, and when this was done they were all instructed to wear tassels on the corners of their garment. Into each tassel was bound a cord of blue.
Despite God's warnings, rebellion continued to spread throughout the camp, and three men, Korah, Dathan, and Abiram, openly challenged the authority of Moses and Aaron. Korah, as a Levite, resented the fact that the priesthood was confined to the family of Aaron, while Dathan and Abiram, both Reubenites, were contemptuous of Moses' authority, and resentful of the circumstances into which he had brought them. Korah led a bunch of the elders of Israel in seeking to offer priestly incense before the Lord, but the cloud of glory appeared to the congregation and God warned all the camp to stand back from the tents of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram. As these men and their families stood at the door of their tents, suddenly the ground opened beneath them and they were all swallowed alive. Furthermore, fire from the Lord consumed the elders.
In further stubbornness, the people complained again to Moses and Aaron, accusing them of responsibility for the death of those who had been punished. Immediately a plague from God broke out among them, and thousands died before Aaron filled his spot with fire and made atonement for the people. Then the plague stopped. To put an end to the complaining, God commanded each of the heads of tribes to write their name on a rod, along with that of Aaron, and leave them in the tent of meeting overnight. On the next day Aaron's rod had budded, blossomed, and bore fruit.
Further regulations were then given for the sanctity of the priesthood and the work of the Levites, and provision was made for their support from tithes and offerings. The tribe of Levi was to have no part of the division of the land when they came into Canaan, because the tithe was to be their inheritance. The priests, also, were to have no inheritance, for God himself was their portion.
Then it reaches the record of events at the close of the 40 years, when the people were again at Kadesh-Barnea. Miriam, the sister of Aaron and the half-sister of Moses, died and was buried. Also, once again the people were without water. When they complained, God graciously sent Moses and Aaron with the rod to a rock to speak to it that the people may have water. But although God was gracious, Moses was ungracious, and in his irritation and unbelief he struck the rock twice. For doing this, God told both Moses and Aaron that they would not be able to lead the people into the land. But, nevertheless, he caused the rock to bring forth water for the people's needs.
Then Aaron died, after giving his priestly garments to his son Eleazar.
The king of Arad, a Canaanite leader, attacked Israel as they called to God for grace, and was defeated. Immediately after their victory came the snakes sent among the people because of their impatience against Moses.
Numbers tells the story of Balaam, a strange prophet who seemed to have a genuine knowledge of God, yet his heart was filled with lusting for material things. He was hired by Balak, the king of Moab, to curse Israel, since Moab was next on their way of travel. Told by God that Israel was only to be blessed, Balaam sent the Moabite king home with his refusal. He angered him by blessing the Isrealites again and again. But once again Balak sent princes to him to offer a huge reward if he would come and curse Israel. God, reading the true intent of Balaam's heart, permitted him to go, though He was displeased with his motives. On his way, Balaam was confronted by an angel of the Lord--with drawn sword. However, only Balaam's donkey saw the angel. Three times the donkey turned aside to avoid the avenging angel. But when Balaam, in anger, kept beating the donkey, the donkey was given the ability to speak and ask him, was this something typical of his behavior? That's when he realized the angel of the Lord was standing there.
Three times Balak sought to have Balaam curse Israel, and three times the prophet was unable to utter cursings but instead, predicted a devine call of Israel, their protection by God, and their ultimate conquering of the people around them. When Balak refused to pay him, Balaam gave him a speech of doom against them.
Of the original number that left Egypt, only two men were permitted to enter the Promised Land.... These were Caleb and Joshua, the men of faith, who kept faith to God. At this point, God informed Moses that the time had come for him to die, and at Moses' request for a successor, God appointed Joshua. Joshua would not inherit the full authority Moses exercised, but he would discover the will of God.
After reviewing the route taken by Israel from Egypt to the Jordan, and giving directions for the division of the land when the tribes enter it, Moses assigned certain cities as residences for the people, six of which are especially designated as places of refuge for those who had killed as the result of an accident or a sudden flare of temper.
Numbers is the record of the failure of the people in their constant stubbornness and foolishness, yet it is also the story of the unfailing patience and continual faithfulness of God.
Sunday, June 18, 2006
Leviticus Report:
This one isn't easy for me. I read all of Leviticus, but I don't really know what to say about it.
Mostly it covered the laws God set for the Isrealites after they left Egypt....from worship to sacrifices, to clean/unclean animals and business dealings with each other.
In most cases, the penalty of sin was the shedding of blood. Sometimes it was the blood of the person who committed the sin, and sometimes it was through the blood of animals through sacrifice.
I had alot of trouble with Leviticus. I really don't get it.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Friday, June 09, 2006
Satan wants me. I know this; have known for a long time. He's tried so many times to take me under, and has worked through people to make it happen for most of my life. There was a time not so long ago that he convinced me I would benefit from acceptance and kindness to him. I let him influence me until my body was covered in his marks, and my spirit cut just as deeply. He turned people who were supposed to love me away from me, against me, on me.
But I've never wanted to admit it was him. I knew he was evil, but he encouraged me to believe he was telling the truth...that no one could ever love me, no one would keep me. And he came very, very close to succeeding in convincing one of high importance that he shouldn't love me, shouldn't keep me. But he went to God and was shown the truth, and since has infallible strength and faith along with determination to never give me up.
I know it's what I should do. I was told by email today to continue to pray, get my chores accomplished and not take the hand of Satan, who wants to lead me somewhere else.
Satan, for once I have something to say to you.
You are wrong. Sure, you've turned people away from me, said, "I told you so....come with me..." many times over. But you are a true bully, aren't you? A real manipulator. You tell me I should listen to you, because your evil ways are the closest to love I'll ever get. But aren't you the one who is encouraging them to stop loving me? Aren't you the one who wants them to cast me aside and make me the enemy, just to pull me closer to you?
You cause my pain. You enjoy my pain. It means I'll run back into your ravenous clutches, and you'll have another pitiful life to claim. You let the stress and hurt make me ill. You were the one who told me to swallow entire bottles of aspirin when I was ten years old, telling me death was better than where I was and where I was going. You said there was no hope. You stared me down through the narrowed slits of my grandfather's eyes and said "No one will ever love you. Ever." You raped me with the spears of those who should have been willing to kill anyone who tried. You terrorized me in my dreams. You followed me. You put the blade to my skin, and provided the pressure that drew blood. You saw the things God gave me, and you did your part to ensure they were taken away. You've tried so hard to take away what I have, and now that God has intervened, you try to take me away with illness. You make me tired when I need to work. You make me angry when I should submit. You are the very vomit that swells out of me when the one God sent ensures nutrition goes in.
It was all you. It has always been you.
And I think now that I hate you. You couldn't love me. You just wanted to keep me from God, because you are selfish, and you want power. There is someone who cares on this earth, and God sent him to me to keep me away from you, forever.
You can't have me.
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
I don't seem to have the option of titling on this template, so I'll have to make a small introduction. I just finished reading the book of Exodus. The following is my report on what I learned: Location: Egypt. The Pharoah of Egypt ordered all first born sons to be drowned. One Isrealite woman bore a son, and hid him as long as she could. When she could hide him no longer, she made a basket out of reeds and placed the baby in the basket, and hid it next to the river. An egyptian royalty found the baby, and wanted to keep him as her own. But she couldn't nurse him, so she asked a child to take the baby to someone who could. The child took the baby to their mother, and she nursed her own son until he was old enough to wean, and go to the egyptian woman. He was named Moses, and was raised as part of the egyptian family. When Moses was grown, he saw how the Isrealites suffered. They were slaves and were overworked and beaten brutally. He watched an egyptian beating a slave and killed him. When he found out the egyptians were after his life for the killing, he fled. That is when God found him, showing himself to Moses in the form of a burning bush, and told him to go to the pharoah and tell him that God said to let His people leave Egypt for 3 days to pray and make sacrifices to their Lord. (Lord being God's name).. He told Moses that the pharoah wouldn't let the slaves leave, but would be hardened and stubborn, and that he would bring about plagues until the pharoah begged them to go..and then God would save them from slavery, as He had promised their fathers centuries beforehand (Abraham and Jacob). Moses was told to throw down his staff and it would turn into a snake, not because Moses possessed those powers, but because God was working His powers through Moses. Every time Moses pleaded with the pharoah to release the Isrealites, the pharoah refused, and a plague would fall upon egypt....each leaving severe damage, distress and death in it's wake. Pharoah would relent and ask Moses to convince God to remove the plagues...but as soon as they were gone, he hardened again and refused to allow the Isrealites their 3 days of freedom. Then came the night that God instructed the Isrealites to slaughter and eat a lamb, and to wipe it's blood across the frame of their doors. That night, God passed through Egypt, skipping over the houses with blood, and taking the first born son of all egyptian homes, so that there was not a single house where someone had not died. Even the pharoah's first born son was taken. It was then that the egyptians began to plead with Moses to take the Isrealites and go. God instructed the Isrealites to celebrate this night every year hence....the origins of Passover. Moses led the Isrealites out of Egypt. When the pharoah realized they were not coming back, he gathered his army and went after them. But God worked through Moses to part the Red Sea, and they rode through on dry ground to safety. When the pharoah and his army attempted to follow, the sea crashed down around them, drowning and washing them all away. The Isrealites traveled for many days without water, and grew bitter against God. They said he wasn't taking care of them and they were better off as slaves in Egypt. Moses asked God for help, and He told him to strike a rock with his staff, whereupon water appeared. God left a special food of perfect nutrition called Manna for the Isrealites to gather and eat. He instructed them to not hoard the food, or it would rot by the next day. Some attempted to be greedy against God's instructions, and awoke the next morning to find their food had rotted and filled with maggots. Moses was angry, because the Isrealites quickly lost faith in God when things didn't go their way and would consequently disobey. God instructed Moses to go up on a mountain to recieve instruction. He was on the mountain for forty days in God's presence. God passed down His commandments: 1. Do not worship any other Gods. 2. Don't make idols or worship idols. 3. Do not use God's name in vain...this means by harsh language, or by the use of God's name to fuel anger or hatred, or anything unholy and not meeting God's expectations. 4. Keep the sabbath day holy (7th day of the week, the day that God rested after creation) 5. Honor your father and mother (respect and obey as caretakers, teachers and trainers in a position of authority and guidance. In my case, this applies not to my biological father and mother, but to my brother). 6. Do not murder. 7. Do not commit adultery. 8. Do not steal 9. Do not lie 10. Do not covet (become jealous or greedy for what others have). While Moses was on the mountain with God, the Isrealites began, once again, to rebel. Moses had been gone a long time, and they felt he had deserted them. They asked Aaron, Moses's brother, to make an idol for them to worship and make sacrifices to. Aaron collected the jewelry from the women and melted them into gold, then formed from the melted metal a golden calf. The Israelites worshipped the calf and made sacrifices, proclaiming the calf the reason they were led out of Egypt and slavery. When God saw what they were doing, He was angry and was going to destroy them all, but Moses pleaded with Him to back away from His anger. Moses went down the mountain, and was so angered by the sight that he threw down the engraved commandments and broke them on the rocks. He demanded all the Israelites who would follow God to come to him, and then sent them back with their swords to slay all those who had turned against God. They were instructed to build a tabernacle, or temple for worship. They were to build an altar for sacrifice, and a place for blessed holy water. They were given instructions for building tables and garments for priests. Everything was built to specifications by God, and He went with them as they were guided by an Angel ---with a wall of fire that guided them on their journeys. They were taught about behavior towards each other, and their slaves. This is the birth and organization of the nation of the future Savior. I looked up the meaning of the word Exodus: meaning "a way out" or "departure". During this time, redemption came through blood. Every part of Exodus shows God's concern with the human affairs. It is here that one learns the nature of God- His love, His anger, His jealousy, and His ability to forgive anything. "For forty years, Moses thought he was somebody. Then he spent forty years learning he was nobody. After that, he spent another forty years learning what God can do with a 'nobody'." --unknown author
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
This blog is going to be where I go to reflect on spiritual issues, prayer and the writing of Bible lessons. A little background - I have none. I grew up in a home that was never home, loved by parents who didn't love me, taught by those who never taught me, and kept safe by those who didn't care for my safety. I was told that God doesn't exist, and that if He does, He could never love me. I was abused: mentally, emotionally, sexually, physically. I was self-abusive, suicidal, angry and lonely. I was lost, and had no where to turn, no one's arms open for me.
Just when I thought there was no hope left, a light shone into my life, and God spoke to my heart, telling me the prayers of a tired little girl would finally be answered. I ran into that promise headlong, only to be devastated to find the family I was certain God ordained had turned away from me. I spent two years clinging desperately to the remnants, to the big brother and father figure I'd been given, only to nearly lose him again and again to manipulations and doubts.
I was angry at God. I'd spent years fighting through for just one more day, with faith that the real thing would be there soon. And here it was given to me, only to be ripped out from under me and I, betrayed beyond repair. Had I been tricked? Could God be so cruel? I spiraled deeply out of control. I allowed my body to be plundered, by strangers and by ill health. I stopped bathing. I stopped eating. I looked for chemical stimulation. I was at the end of the road, and no one seemed to notice. I wasn't supposed to matter, by the view of people. And I was vengeful, wanting to know why...why was I deemed unworthy of love or affection by so many? Wasn't I human too? Did I really deserve this? Was I really not meant to be loved?
But the truth is...yes, I am worthy. I had to hold on with all my strength and wait, for that special teacher/brother/father/mother/saviour on Earth. I had to wait, because he hadn't heard God's message. The one that said I was his. The one that told him to lead me and love me through this life. I waited for 25 years for him. I had to wait 2 more for him to see what I knew in my heart all along. And since then, my heart has wings that soar. I feel happier. I'm starting to smile again. What I believed before was trust-is now overshadowed by the real deal. Complete faith, and a heart that finally has the chance to heal. God lead me to him, and he is leading me to God.
This is our journey. May we never lose our path.
I'm just me, a girl lost from God, finding her way back to Him and to life. Join me on my journey from lost, broken child to a newborn Christian angel.